badafro: I much prefer natural girls. girls who dont wear make up. whose diet consists mostly of soil and mulch. maybe they have an elk as a steed. still use primitive flint based weapons. never seen a lighter before.
do you ever rub your eye and then suddenly remember youre wearing makeup and in that second you feel your whole life come crashing down around you its all over
editorialhedgehog: brainlessandbackwards: brainlessandbackwards: Notice how all of humanity has just gone downhill since they declared that Pluto was not a planet anymore #wrath of Pluto Actually, Pluto was the Roman’s name for Hades. They named a planet after a god of the dead then revoked its planetary status and thought everything would be okay. You fools
carlottathedragonwhore: scruffylookinnerfherder: freetheboobs: Imagine being free all the time. Then suddenly as you begin to grow and mature you are trapped in the dark, hidden away, suffocated and only fully released at night. As you continue to grow you may be forced into ridiculously small spaces, or constantly pushed around. That is the tragic life of a boob. #I don’t know what I was...
filthy-goddamnhorrorshow: mattsmithian: nar-wh4ls: My life has been going down hill ever since they discontinued the wonderball #BUT THEN SOME DUMBASS KIDS STARTED CHOKING ON THE CANDIES INSIDE #IDIOTS #YOU’VE RUINED THE WORLD FOR THE REST OF US #I HOPE YOU’RE PROUD OF YOURSELF#COULDN’T EVEN FIGURE OUT HOW TO BITE INTO A FUCKING WONDERBALL JESUS CHRIST #THAT WASN’T AN UNSAFE CANDY THAT...
pricksatmywindow: i hate how people just expect that youre going to finish school and get an office job and meet someone and settle down and have children and a dog and drive a mazda because i dont want any of those things especially a mazda
Friend: On a scale of 1 to 10, how obsessed are you with Harry Potter.
Me: Nine and three quarters
whats the html code for a social life <go> </outside> 404 error
beellette: dad just said “there should be a netflix for books” five minutes later he shouted “THE LIBRARY”
queefjerkey: do you ever use a pen and you’re just blown away by how smoothly it glides across the page and how the ink flows out so beautifully like tears of jesus or something
me: mom i got all A's
me: mom i cleaned the whole house
me: mom i don't do drugs and i'm not pregnant
mom: is this your cup on the table?
mom: you never do anything right i do for you all day long and you do nothing for me but stress me out you are so out of control you are grounded if you think you had no life before you just wait i cant believe you treat your own mother this way get out of my sight
lord of the flies in a nutshell
ralph: we need a fire
ralph: guys we need a fire
ralph: we really need a fire guys
ralph: a fire
ralph: WE NEED ONE
jack: i have a better idea let's kill everything
mynamekyle: boybands are weird because they always sing about how this one girl is really hot and special and it just makes me confused and wonder if they’re going to try and share her or just completely gang bang her or what
cacen: plot twist: the queen reveals that the olympics is actually the hunger games and all the countries are pitted against each other
mothafickle: tonyllamastark: mothafickle: bulgaria where’s viktor krum i predict ireland will win though yes but bulgaria will catch the snitch
"Look like a lady, think like a man."
holdinghope: theprophet-chuck: Am I the only one insulted by this? I see women posting things like this all the time, and it’s fucking ridiculous. When did we decide that men have a monopoly on intelligent thought? You know you’re insulting yourself when you say this stuff, right? Commentary.